billy solve his problems with by calling up his mom
heather solves her problems with drugs and alcohol
daniel solves his problems with a doctor and the law
but malcolm´s got his own way, it´s better than them all

´cause malcolm solves his problems with a chain-saw
malcolm solves his problems with a chain-saw
malcolm solves his problems with a chain-saw
and he never has the same problem twice

whether it´s a bill or a cheque arriving late
rancid marble cheese or a steak that´s second rate
awful tv programs or a broken elvis plate
or his fiancee who dumps him because he´s gaining weight

malcolm solves his problems with a chain-saw
malcolm solves his problems with a chain-saw
malcolm solves his problems with a chain-saw
and he never has the same problem twice

and he goes vrrrrrmmm vrrrrrmmm
problem solved!